Reconnecting to What Matters Most: A Values Guide for the Holiday Season

Values are like lanterns. Small points of light that help guide us through the places that feel noisy or unclear.

The holiday season often brings with it a heightened level of activity, stimulation, and emotional complexity. It can be a time of joy and connection, but it can also be a time when stress patterns, family dynamics, and expectations increase. In seasons like this, one of the most powerful tools we have is the ability to reconnect with our values.

Values serve as an internal compass. They guide us toward what feels meaningful and away from what drains our energy or disconnects us from ourselves. When we are clear on what matters most, our choices feel less pressured and more intentional.

Why Values Matter During the Holidays

The holidays are filled with competing demands including invitations, traditions, family expectations, financial considerations, and the cultural pressure to create a perfect season can leave us feeling overstretched.

When we lose contact with our values, we often shift into automatic behaviors:

• saying yes when we mean no

• taking on more than we can manage

• prioritizing others' expectations over our own well-being

• becoming overwhelmed without understanding why

Values bring us back.

A Somatic Approach to Values

Values are more than concepts. They are felt experiences. When we act in alignment with our values, the body communicates that truth. We may feel:

• a sense of groundedness

• an ease in the breath

• a softening in the chest

• a feeling of clarity or steadiness

  
  

When we act out of alignment, the body communicates that too:

• tension

• constriction

• pressure

• irritability

• heaviness

Using the body as feedback can help us stay connected to what feels true.

Three Ways to Reconnect With Your Values This Season

1. Begin with noticing

Ask yourself: What is pulling at my attention or energy right now? Then ask: Which of these things actually matter to me?

This simple inquiry often reveals the difference between true priorities and inherited expectations.

2. Choose one value to guide your week

Connection. Rest. Creativity. Presence. Simplicity. Self-advocacy. Service. Pick one. Let it shape the rhythm of your days.

When we focus on one value at a time, decision making becomes clearer and boundaries become more natural.

3. Pay attention to how your body responds

Your nervous system will often tell you when you are aligned and when you are drifting. Pause. Breathe. Notice. Values are not about perfection. They are about gently returning to yourself.

What I Am Centering This Season

As I reconnect with my own values this holiday season, the one that keeps coming forward for me is delight. For me, delight has shown up in small and creative ways. Making gifts for people I love, including tiny dollhouses and miniature furniture that light up something childlike in my soul. Drying oranges. Baking. Stringing garland. Creating a cozy, simple, festive feel inside my home. Hosting a 'craft'ernoon with loved ones. Driving around to look at lights. Letting myself enjoy the process instead of rushing through it.

Choosing delight also means making space for it. It asks me to gather materials, clear time in my calendar, send invitations, and say no to other things. It requires me to notice when a hurried, accelerated pace begins to take over. Stress feels like contraction in my body. Delight feels like expansion. That contrast helps me sense when I am aligned and when I am drifting.

Part of my continued healing has been reclaiming the holiday season from a time that once felt heavy, chaotic, and shaped by walking on eggshells. Now I am choosing to center pleasure, connection, ease, and simplicity. And this year, that looks like delight.

Closing Reflection

As the season unfolds, see if you can let your values lead. Notice what matters. Notice what drains you. Notice what brings you home to yourself.

This is how we create holidays that feel meaningful rather than overwhelming. This is how we honor both our capacity and our truth. This is how we reconnect with what matters most.

✨Next week, we will explore boundaries as values in action and how to protect what is important during a season that can easily overtake us.